Of course the ole tradition of making resolutions… much older than you might think in a blink, the early traces are back to Babylon (more of a right of honoring the harvest) but our tradition is most likely traced back to Janus (a two faced god… well, in a good way) whom could look back at the past year and into the new one (and sacrifices were made hence to ensure the year to come). But resolutions… like the breath of wind upon the prairie, gone in nary a second as the dreamy bubble of the holiday expires and we climb back into our normal star ship of life (and blast off forgetting). So, dispatch with resolutions. If you want something done in your life commit to a revolution. That is a plan of action in the place of words. The latin is “revolutio” quite literally meaning a turn around and if that is what you seek – seek revolution! If your tool is resolutions they will wind up as bits of fast food wrappers on the side of the highway of life in a few moments by. Revolution takes effort, planning, put through and then… more effort. Revolutions are never won and done, they are messy, they are looked back upon with gilded guides but in the moment – nothing glorified as such – but the end result is what matters most.
You want to make a change? Commit to a revolution in the scope of the next revolution of our planet around the sun, that new year, from this then old one. Not so far now we will already have come, the countdown begun has the first shot rung?
in a flowerpot
admire all the beauty
even in the dirt
(OK, I went the haiku way which I usually don’t but when it writes itself, what am I to do ?)
there is nothing new about this year, it is another day, another chance, the ritual has value (renewal if you hold it true), but time, time, the actual thing “time” could care less if you are in summer bliss or winter hiding, remember this. Take a breath, really, take a moment and (STOP) look at the most mundane of things and see the miracles residing there. All the things that conspired in the course of history just for you to read these words (and me to write them) is an amazingly insane concoction… is it all just random? maybe. maybe not. I do not propose to know what creates these things but they are there if you look, it may be all science, and that is fine by me, either way the amazing exists right under our noses, our everyday snouts, if we care to look.
A two-fer this morning, plus a poem, yours for only $19.95 in 192 installments! new and improved! just set it … and forget it! So sit back on your my pillow and if you spill something don’t worry about it, just sham wow it ! if you’re hungry just chop some nuts and if you want a relaxing boat ride I have just the solution… now, without further nonsense my entries to my actual collection…
reason for being 12.29.2018 in the AM walking out to my car for work
I noticed the flap of red overlap of a local newspaper plastic sleeve in my driveway bend up and over this morning in the breeze, if I was not there to witness who might be, so was this event just for me? a universe wink? something to ponder? or nothing at all (aside from a racing mind)? the immensity of what had to transpire in the universe (to this point) to just have this simple, seemingly meaningless moment of my notice is beyond calculation, barely in the grasp of comprehension and surely more complex than humanity may ever know, but there it was, a moment just for me to see in a world of all happening and motion, of lives starting, ending and being, of the earth spinning, the sun breathing radiation upon our goldilox home, the sheer perfection of the amalgamation of circumstance, in a blink and I move on, to the mundane spectacular that is this daily life. (but listen closely, for a moment, just a fraction I bet, time stopped and froze, for that pose my eye composed in just that very precious second in between all seconds, I did not chose this, it chose me, and in that exists the birth of miracles, if you stop to notice).
Photo by mali maeder on Pexels.com
winter flowers (driving to work)
not that today should be (or is) any different than the next (or previous), but decidedly I feel a different vibe going on, driving to work this morning the sky feels more alive, the winter sun’s emissaries bursting in lines out through the unmanned outposts of barren branches, casting long shadows across the road (right to left) showcasing cars upon the median wall in a procession of shadows like the projection of a carousel at night, the light adding a shimmer to the leftovers on the asphalt from yesterday’s never ending deluge, somehow things seem better, warmer, surely not in truth by empirical data (my usual cozy), but in feel, who am I to argue, but rather observe and revel, something about the winter sunlight beams as the earth’s pores broadcast open wide and soak them all in, the clouds all in place in one layer, sitting there aligned as a blueprint laid on top of the blue by a steady hand, many times I ponder that which is beyond this atmosphere, out there, but today… I am perfectly grounded within that laid out in front and behind, this morning drive, I can’t quite put my finger on it, but maybe that has been my problem sometimes, sometimes it is better to sit back and take it all in, smell the roses, even in winter when flowers are rarer but not unknown.
for winter flowers are rarer to see blooms on stark precious domain a lifeboat rises in the barren sea when all hope has left for none winter blooms in the faded sun
Never my favorite song (but other KX fans love it to death) but this video shows the devotion of the fans and what it is like to be at a show… the band does not even have to sing (have you been a part of anything like this? I have over the years, mostly Over My Head), by the way Dug is almost 70 (the lead singer), seriously, they have been killing it out there as one of the most original bands since the 1980s, here is the original version just for comparison. Ty Tabor is the reason I picked up a guitar (before Eric Johnson blew my mind, and SRV). Jerry ? A NJ guy so what can I say, I’m partial…
and as always, likes, follows and thoughts (comments) are always appreciated.
so, the wave has begun
the first domino has fallen
a generation has come
to begin an end.
I have seen the wave coming
off on the horizon
everything seems so far off
in the inevitable ocean
but so soon crashing upon the shore
this is the way of things
for we are mere pillars
rock fashioned of sand
drawn down and back into the surf
from which we once rose
in and out the flow
just life
for us to suppose
and follow, as if we have a choice
but we pretend
to have some modicum of control
ever looking at the horizon
and the coming waves
as they come for me
surely, some day
might I be aware
and enjoy the warm rays
bright bouquets to grace the peaks
one more time
upon the waves
that carry my soul away
to some other place
I hope
to some other place
I pray
notes… as I stated in an earlier post, I have been spared death more than most, but that will not be so anymore, and I sense it, I hope I have the strength to relent it and continue on, in the pattern of such things it becomes difficult to reconcile self worth, or more plainly my life’s worth upon this earth, there is no accomplishment any of us can make that will satisfy my view of the world, so I just have to fall back on faith, and fate, and the two combined will be my future, I know what that is but do I accept it ? do I quit? or do I fight and meet the same outcome? these are the thoughts that cross my mind. There is so much to life, so much, that needs to be the focus but I must admit, I struggle.
I knew, in the back of my mind, somewhere (in that dusty old space), among those piles of clutter, old magazines in a digital age, piled up like ancient grave markers but not as grand, more or less memories, piles of them, lying around, I figure I might use them one day, what day? probably never, but there is comfort in them, the familiar things, places I’ve been, they surely are not stepping stones, so I knew, back when this started, this experiment upon reflection, sitting out on the porch seemed like such a harmless predilection, so I knew, I told myself that this would one day (soon) seem like not the smartest endeavor, given the weather, I don’t mind the rain, but the cold, I tell myself it isn’t THAT cold, only 32, c’mon man you grew up here, be a man, toughen up, is it brave or tough to sit out in the cold? surely not, but was it worth it? for these thoughts.
notes… hey, it has been a while, I looked at my pay stub and I did 73 hours last week, sure, I don’t have kids, I get it, but 73 hours is a pretty rough week, and weak it made my writing, I have been remiss, but things ebb and flow, and so do I, I was inspired enough to post, and that is enough, for now, winter is the time of slumber, to burn lumber for warmth and more likely comfort, I am skating out to the end of the year, I just learned tonight that my uncle of age 91, fell, and is most likely done, he broke his neck, a man I worked for and respect, an intellectual (sharp as a tack), reduced to a bed ridden individual, I am not sure what will happen with my uncle sammy, that is his name, I didn’t plan to post about it, but that is what it is, I wrote the above earlier but my mind is now particular, at times like these we measure our lives against those, those who are passing, surely a life lived, but a life gone? still, it stings home. I will miss my uncle even if this is not his final night, but at 91 with a broken neck, facing surgery, do I pray ? I hope, but I know the outcome if not in this day, this is all from the cuff, my apologies, I just have to post.
After all I am a bit of a science nerd, and the Voyager probes (launched in 1977) are only slightly younger than me, probe #2 has finally left the heliosphere becoming the second man made object to do so, in short the sun’s influence extends out way farther than we can imagine in our day to day terms but there is a horizon where it does end, and our emissaries are out there now for all time (the chances of them colliding with anything is very low, space is quite empty, when you view pictures of galaxies and what not the space in between individual stars is vast, even galaxies colliding do not collide per se but the gravitational forces do the collision work/damage, we are of course, on a collision course with the Andromeda galaxy, not you or me will be around to see it however, nor those who first see it as it will take billions of years even when it happens)
What is the point of all this ? perhaps a metaphor. In 40 years what have I accomplished ? And yet in 40 years our species launched some probes that are now all that might be left of our civilization. The realization of that achievement of our tech of that day visiting the outer planets and now beyond our reach. I believe it is a pinnacle of human achievement, and on a personal level we can scale that down the same. Shoot for the moon they say, nah, shoot for it all, even coming up short leaves you at neptune. I should take my own advice, and I truly try, maybe every time I look upward, into the sky, I can remember those little probes with less memory power than my phone, racing out into the universe, so far from home, but with all of us on board, in some capacity, for some other life form to discover, maybe a billion years from now, maybe four billion, at that point what does it matter, but at that point we all will matter, touching another form of life, out there, humanity will have existed…
10.30.2018
a path of stars
cosmic dust footprints
to follow, out beyond mars
into the cosmos
maps of constellations guides
mariner of the universal sky
I disappear off into the night
of space, and to explore
the space, of infinite expansion
the universe, final destination
My Voyager series is here. I often contemplate the universe, surely beyond my comprehension in totality but why not consider it… humans are capable of a great many things (yes both good and bad, we need to choose sides at times).
Your thoughts and comments are always appreciated, as well as recipes for strata…
Driving a ton, as I do, I commute all over the tri-state area on a weekly basis, I try to be a good (courteous) driver, admittedly I will purposely speed up to block a jerk, sorry, can’t help myself, but mostly I am a good egg, which leads me to this post, to me, as I was raised (or taught I suppose), when someone let’s you in a lane you are pining for in sheer desperation or in an utter sweaty panic (because the other driver surely does not have to defer), you give them the old ‘courtesy wave‘, a simple hand gesture that universally expresses your thanks to the driver now behind that you appreciate the act of kind, certainly this has become a much endangered animal compared to it’s little (but wildly popular) brother, the one finger salute, and I do not want to confuse this with the infuriating ‘hand out the window / flag you down sort of’ gesture, no, I hate that one, the driver lowers down the window and starts to direct you like they are pharaoh and you are building the pyramids, nope, no thank you, take that garbage back to whatever primitive culture you came from, I am talking about genuine courtesy, of course there is this, but …. I just can’t wrap my head around it, a little courtesy, sheesh, why is it so difficult ?
notes… a good amount to unpack here, if you don’t want my explanations and thought levels stop reading… ok, now just you and me left talking, this is based on the danse macabre, a movement, well, a thought that became a movement back in the 1400s that spanned well over a couple of hundred years, the catharsis or the pinnacle thought being that we are all going to die, true enough, but it embodied modesty with theme, from a child to a king there is no escape from the ultimate end so why not party on dudes ! well.. maybe more elegant than that… the whole “pope” line is based on art of the day which typically showed the five figures I describe, note I use “a” and “the” in spots, “the child” is both a reference to literally children and also jesus christ (“the” child), the fifth member of the party is the laborer hence my plowman’s line (another biblical reference as well), I also am using double meaning in “plot” and “lot” in the following lines, ‘memento mori’ in latin is “remember you must die”, pretty much the rallying cry of the danse macabre movement, and the last line is my play on “the night is young” and also “the good die young” (revelers), the night has been there all along, and with that I bid you a good night, or a good day, this poem came to me and made me full with muse, that nimble minx, thank you my dear… for this.
music… going deep doom metal here… no death vocals, just the grinding forward sound of life, the constant sound, this song sums it up with sweeping piano and languished guitars…
notes… I finished up work about 3am last night (after a 1:30am jaunt monday… virus protection on your PCs people argghhghgh!!!), I was down in the boogie down bronx (actually a historical site turned into a supermarket), not exactly the nicest area but I have to say I enjoy traveling all over the tri-state area into every conceivable economic situation from Newark, the Bronx, Franklin Lakes, Millville, Smithtown, Copiague, Danbury, Hastings-On-Hudson, Cold Springs and so many more. It is a good way to stick the thermometer of life in and take a reading to see what you don’t have on the high end and how much you do compared to those who live with much less. I value that perspective, I try to ground myself in it (not always successful). sheesh I can ramble, point being I have been busy and tired (uninspired) but this hit me word for word as I got in my car this morning. I opened the car door, heard this one little bird, I scanned for it, I could not triangulate the little bugger, even with no cover from leaves, bare trees and this singular sound bouncing about, sure in my head I know there are birds that stick it out, but still, if I had wings, would I stay in a place, like this ?
music? … I must admit a guilty pleasure here, although they are technically sound I swear! Underrated band that met their end too soon (and of course there is a NJ connection, hey, I am a homer)…
Shades of My Garden 