I see things in motion…

I see things in motion…

photo of person walking on deserted island
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12.25.2018 “generations”

so, the wave has begun
the first domino has fallen
a generation has come
to begin an end.
I have seen the wave coming
off on the horizon
everything seems so far off
in the inevitable ocean
but so soon crashing upon the shore
this is the way of things
for we are mere pillars
rock fashioned of sand
drawn down and back into the surf
from which we once rose
in and out the flow
just life
for us to suppose
and follow, as if we have a choice
but we pretend
to have some modicum of control
ever looking at the horizon
and the coming waves
as they come for me
surely, some day

might I be aware
and enjoy the warm rays
bright bouquets to grace the peaks
one more time
upon the waves
that carry my soul away
to some other place
I hope
to some other place
I pray

notes… as I stated in an earlier post, I have been spared death more than most, but that will not be so anymore, and I sense it, I hope I have the strength to relent it and continue on, in the pattern of such things it becomes difficult to reconcile self worth, or more plainly my life’s worth upon this earth, there is no accomplishment any of us can make that will satisfy my view of the world, so I just have to fall back on faith, and fate, and the two combined will be my future, I know what that is but do I accept it ? do I quit? or do I fight and meet the same outcome?  these are the thoughts that cross my mind.  There is so much to life, so much, that needs to be the focus but I must admit, I struggle.

On the way to work today (nostalgia).

On the way to work today (nostalgia).

yellow school bus beside gray concrete building
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left – right

left – right

up – down

up – down

red lights

parents wave goodbye

only for the day.

school bus

notes… not sure how the school buses function where you are, here it seems to be pretty much the same since I was a wee lad, the ritual of parents escorting you to the corner to board onto the bus for the day, seems like forever a go,  the memories came charging back so vividly when I was stuck behind a bus this morning (mesmerized by the rhythm of the lights). something that was so routine it was the routine, all we knew, gone after being there for so long, like everything else we get used to, life marches on.

Musical choice?  I am in the need of some classical, so time to pull out an old fave…

Sebelius : Finlandia (as performed by the BBC Symphony and Chorus)

Gravity is a toll road.

Gravity is a toll road.

person holding a chalk in front of the chalk board
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Often I think about how we fill our minds up with ‘stuff‘ (thank you George Carlin)… How easy it was to be in the blissful cross-hairs of youth.  Innocence is just one of those things that can not be put back into the bottle (as much as we may try).  I used to feel a sad pity for those with special needs but now at times I am jealous (to an extent as a mental exercise) that they can exist in the perpetual bliss of unawareness.  Sure, I would not be who I am if I was not self aware… but the pull of that other option, the temptation is certainly there.  Self awareness and in my case overly active brain is tiring at times… maybe that is why when I am on vacation I prefer a lonely beach so I can pretend that the waves are washing away all the crust the world has built up upon my hull…  but it takes a toll… how much? We will never know.  But if you do… I would love the answer, please tell me so… so I can truly rest before the true (final) rest.  But I suppose, like everyone I will just be out there sailing the seas of thought seeking islands of legend… and then one day running aground near some nameless forgotten port, sinking, absorbed into the shifting sands at the bottom of the ocean of time, my particles to become the building blocks for some other creation… be it animated or not, a crab perhaps but I would hope for more…. but like all else I am not in control of such things.

simple observation” 6.10.18

children playing

children’s smiles

making up games

rules are loose


made up races

I miss the whimsy of youth

notes on the poem: I wrote this in a rest area on the GSP… (like many things), a couple and their kids had unloaded out onto the picnic area… and just… the kids did what kids do, making games of the world, amazing, I miss that.

musical accompaniment…

for whatever reason… this piece came to my mind:

Jean Sibelius – Symphony no 5 in E flat op 82

I like the peaks and falls, and the quiet parts…