Tag: love

I’ve lost that… feeling.

I’ve lost that… feeling.

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
night building forest trees
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

“phantom you” 5/31/18

phantom limb

I feel you

fifteen years passed

motion forward

still photograph

in my hand

is all I have

notes… truth be told, this is truth.  I am without her for 15 years now… it seems crazy to contemplate or digest, I am wired different than the rest of you (I think), I am quite sure she is not.  I never took many photos, but then again I have an almost photographic mind…so…. I remember almost everything down to the last detail, which is great, and torture.  I remember exactly how the scar on her right arm feels… she never told me the story, I never pressed, I figured it did not matter as she was with me, and… and… what does it matter, but I remember how distinct it felt (and still do)…  I raise my fingers to my lips and whisper her name, so I can feel the sound reverberate against my finger tips… I miss her, I feel incomplete… but, there is nothing I can do, I screwed it all up… and I’m sorry, but I am here now… but I want to go back… but I can’t.

music… I am on an Anna Murphy kick, she rules, her solo album is amazing… but check this out… I dare anyone to not hear her vocal prowess:

Anna Murphy – Sick

wait until about 1 minute in… after that… man… vocal power unlike you have heard in a while, trust me… the guitar lick almost sounds like Johnny Cash covering NIN “Hurt”…

One of the Wonders of 7.

One of the Wonders of 7.

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
bloom blossom flora flower
Photo by icon0.com on Pexels.com

“gardens” 5/30/18

of light and seed

of rain and soil

through many gardens

have I come.

the path, looking back

winds around

framed by memories

of wilt and drought

of bulb and bloom

yet when the sun rises

there is always you

my seven tiers of babylon

our brief time of perfection

under the golden sun.

 

that was then

now lost to time

so I carry on

my will, my prayers, my hope

carry on

I will always remember

my heart is gone

but will not forget

you

my seven tiers of babylon.

notes…  I had some differing things in mind here…  of course I am referring to the Hanging Gardens of Babylon (one of the original 7 wonders of the world, and no… not from the mini golf course in Overboard (the original not the remake))… I was also thinking about the all time great poem Kubla Khan by Samuel Taylor Coleridge… So.. throw that all in a blender and make it about love as well in a personal context… love being like a garden we cultivate (hopefully) but like a real garden there are so many factors that factor into the outcome… the rest I will leave up to you, because if you got this far, well, thanks.

post note… I forgot to mention.. 7, it is considered a magical number, my birth date is 7 times 3, both considered magical numbers, so no, I am not into astrology or numerology… just sayin…

Also, 7 days in a week.. seven “tier” (tears)… 7 openings in your head… all these things are in this poem, in my head … and now yours I suspect.

music? … ok, maybe…  here is something pretty nature-y and ambient (I hate that word sometimes as it may imply boring electronica but… there is no other genre word, I think… so just trust me).  Sounds from the Ground has put out some awesome stuff over the years, this particular track always stuck with me… it tells an old fable/tale over cool calm music… very unique… you have to listen to get it…

Sounds from the Ground “Pearl”

respite. relax. refuge.

respite. relax. refuge.

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
lion sleeping beside rock
Photo by Aldo Picaso on Pexels.com

as I am prone and known to do, I like to lighten the load on my loafers towards the weekend… I just got off the phone with work (a brutal installation that had me working 38 hours in 3 days…ugh)… so I need to reach back and relax, take a deep breath…. relax… so. some not so serious quips from my quiver … to deliver – to you. and why a lion? I’m a leo of course if you could not tell from the braggadocio of my vernacular.

5/31/18

for sale

by the owner

no one likes the listing

no one is listening

“parts” 6.3.18

replace love

so I go to the love parts store

but there is nothing there

that I haven’t bought before

the model I owned

is no longer in stock

buried in years

universal clock

6.7.18

I am an oyster

with the pearl removed

they say the cause is an irritant

if this is true

I would like very much

to be bothered again

by you

Music!!!  what could be more fun than scatterbrain ?? ?  cmon now… !  I can’t believe how old this is but it brings back memories… they had some great tunes, dude…

Scatterbrain “Don’t Call Me Dude”

fallen angels.

fallen angels.

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
statue angel cemetery
Photo by Ghost Presenter on Pexels.com

“fallen” 6.14.18

so I know how they felt

the angels that fell

eternal cries

of pain

separated from your love

shattered

broken

cast into a dessert fire

sweltering heat

never ending sun

my skin boils

cooked to the bone

but this –

surface agony

compared to the realization

is nothing

the separation

the fall

for all eternity

Notes… I’m not religious (and hold no ire for those who are, more on that some other time as I have a bunch to unload on that topic) but you would have to admit (if you love a good story) that the bible certainly has some great writing in parts (other parts of the bible are just instructional and clearly written by clergy with a mission imo… I’m talking the sodom and gomorrah type of stuff here people!).

Specifically in this case, I love the play of free will vs. obedience to god… sort of a conundrum (if you have free will… won’t god know your choices anyway etc?), but also the fall… knowing you made the wrong choice and now you are confined to hell (figuratively) due to your own actions.  Now I am not claiming to be lucifer (the rebel leader)… more or less a lesser angel without that much pride to take on the big honcho in the sky but caught up in the moment… these are all the ingredients baking the cake in my head on this one… not sure if I conveyed it all in the poem, hey, I’m just a guy with a blog, cut me some slack jack.

Tunes… time for some blues, I got those lost woman blues, the I ruined the greatest thing I will ever know blues, I didn’t lose her – I screwed it up, so all I have now is me and my guitar.  Gary Moore “There’s a Hole”

Eons…

Eons…

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
abstract art astronomy background
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

“eons” 4/29/18

I have no want of death

I do not wait for death

yet, the flicker of humanity

will extinguish

and the planet may pause

spinning eons by

carrying some other passengers

until the sun

burns out a billion years

the milky way

one star less bright

one less spark

against the canvas

of absolute night

who might notice

who will bear witness

no sky to look upon and ask why

death will have stolen all

from this little corner

of the universe

I actually wrote something about 9/11 today (in my car reciting it to myself until I arrived at work and feverishly scribbled it down)… but it is something I actually want to work on due to the nature of the moment (very not me, I know, you know if you read anything I write that I am usually just in the moment of now)… Every day I drive a certain section of the NJ Turnpike (geez, what an arcane term) and a hill crests where you can see NYC like a postcard (over that abomination of a train station)…. thousands of cars, we all pass this every day vision in the distance, so close you can almost touch it, I wonder how many pause and are struck by inspiration, surely not the A-hole in the Infiniti all over my bumper… I used to have road rage but now I smile more, because where the hell are we all going ? really?  plus I have great tunes on my USB stick….

So I posted the above because I am determined to post everything I write for the most part… good or bad, this is not about me showcasing my best stuff.. this is me unloading on the universe that which I am driven to create, and share.  I do not claim to understand how this works, if it works… or anything… if I can touch one life I suppose it is all worth it, even if that life is just mine.. maybe I am a fisherman throwing out my line into the ether… for another her… a companion or just friendship…  I’m not so sure about anything anymore, the more mistakes you make in life the less you trust yourself, but you are better at hiding it… so much better…

The idea of space…

The idea of space…

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
moon and stars
Photo by Min An on Pexels.com

“inner space” 4/24/18

concentrate

I try to feel every atom

the space in between

science tells me so

I travel the air inside

for the answers to this world

“the empty space” 7.12.2018

I am standing

on the end of all known land

I am staring, wondering

I know all this

all this, empty space

and inside

am I just the same?

time ever pulls me on

I struggle

to grip what is beyond

what to make of the landscape

behind

for that which shaped me

and is spent

forward, grinding

until nothing is left

the personal erosion

the never stop heart beat

involuntary breathing

I am falling

into the emptiness

submission

a life’s fulfillment

a dream

has come to an end.

So science (at this time.. because real science changes all the time) tells us by observation that space is actually pretty empty (that’s why the little voyager probes will probably outlive our civilization… 70s tech will last a billion years! oh the power of hot stuff!).  Of course there is the new grease in between the creases thing (see what I mean about science evolving).  So there is immense space in between things but we feel so … connected in our tiny tiny corner of one galaxy in the vast immense insanely large universe… hard to wrap a primitive mind around…  so that is what I was thinking about… the space within our space and how we fill our space within that space.  Heady stuff… but… we only have one life, why not contemplate it all, even if it is much easier to just eat work sleep… I am no different, I’m trying to be, to focus on being a phoenix because I know I am, we all are (well, honestly not every one, I am talking to you, those reading this who have that spark), we choose normal (even our normal) because it takes constant effort to be the pinnacle… but we do owe it to ourselves, even though we will fail… but at least we can get some stuff done… my opinion.

music.  super chill ambient.  Seti “Pharos”, of course SETI is the project to try and detect alien life using the world’s best radio telescopes (like the amazing Arecibo array). This album is a total trip through the cosmos, you can almost imagine the stars as you travel past them (well, at least I can).  draw the shades or curtains, lay back, turn up the bass a little and imagine flying through space passing stars, asteroids and planets… and contemplate what Frank Drake was trying to quantify… definitely some super food for thought.   I appreciate all comments and feedback.. and criticism.. man I love complaints because how the hell am I supposed to see this through your eyes?  hint: I can’t!

Game of Thrones…

Game of Thrones…

by David Koblentz ♥ 1 Comment
antique armor black and white chrome
Photo by Mikes Photos on Pexels.com

So, being the consummate dork I am a huge fan… not of the books (they are a bit of a mess in my opinion.. I am a Tolkien boy after all, he makes more sense) but the show.   So for the hell of it I wrote some GoT inspired stuff… because… why not.  I love watching the reaction to the show here, I don’t know why, but I find it fascinating.  I’ve entertained in my mind flying out there to watch the final episodes… whenever the hell those come out.. come to think of it the show is now matching the output crawl of the books. Life imitates art imitates art… or something?

“Jon Snow” 7.2.18

wolf of the north
born of ice
blood of fire
descendant of the first men
crossed upon the mantle of tri-fire Targaryen
can the balance tame
a dragon’s ire
Daenerys’ desires
can this bond
shield the world
bend all men
into one will
to repel
the ever coming march
of the dead.

upon the wall
and through
O’ Jon Snow
show us the light of the north
the heart that beats flame
and stand before
the gates of doom
to battle upon
where the night king looms;
we look to you
O’ Jon Snow

7.2.18

in the crypts of Winterfell
rests the ages
the sages of generations
wardens of these northern lands
keepers of the sevens’ grant

This kid was the first to do a GoT theme cover on violin (well, I think)…. 7 years ago, and it still rules your world… I learned how to play this on guitar… and it made me happy.

A dead moth…

A dead moth…

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
apartment bath bathroom bathtub
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

in the bottom of my bath basin.  I do not imagine most Americans call it that.  But the word “tub”… is just.. well, ugh.  I think of a tub of lard… or a tub that you throw stuff into (utilitarian but not exactly a thing of beauty).   I mean, even a Tuba sounds like… a Tub+A.  Guitar has a much cooler ring to it.  Anyway, back to the dead moth.  So this thing flew into my shower and I watched it fly into the beating stream (I have one of those adjustable showers and I like the sado setting like raining ball bearings of hot water pelting my back like a good snowball fight).  I thought about scooping up the guy and letting him back out…. but then I figured.. it’s just a damn moth, how long do they live anyway?  Which set off a philosophical conundrum in the foundry of my mind.   We do not live that long relatively speaking.  A Redwood would probably look at me and scoff… and then a Joshua tree (not the U2 album) would comment about the Redwood “oh those silly kids”.  I kind of like the Buddhist idea of reincarnation but what if there is no remembrance of your former thing?  And what if you were reincarnated as the same thing 10 times… or 1000…  So anyway, the moth took about 2 days to finally go down the drain, it kind of hung out in the tide of my showers…  taunting or haunting me, not sure. Just some food for thought.. or some words to digest.. or some other lame gastronomical appropriation… So here is something vaguely related…

“falling” 6.10.18

we are all

in free-fall

terminal velocity

no parachute

or guaranty

without doubt

we reach the bottom

when? we do not know

but the meet the ground

and into

we will go

 

scream or be terrified

or simply

enjoy the ride.