let you not lose that which what you brought into this world a collaboration of souls a miraculous combination of two; let you not see them in the grave before your time has come let the natural order of parent to child overcome please, god, love
note: have I said to much? nah… I am not religious perse but there is all the time we pray for something, call me a fool for belief, that’s cool, I don’t care anymore, I have to believe there is something more, if my belief offends anyone.. who cares, it won’t matter and does not matter in the hundreds of thousands of years of our species, such as it is, a blink in the universe, I want to believe I have a part to play in it all, delusion ? perhaps, but who does it harm if I keep that fire lit for myself?
for into the arms of god go I divine guided path with a fulfilled heart and calm mind, for into the bosom of god am I for my ego shall fade to rest as I have arrived home for all time.
notes… am I not dying anytime soon (I hope) but if I do I hope for more, I am not religious, I do not prescribe to any particular belief, and I do not have any angst against those that do, I have to believe something else is out there, our life on this world is truly a miracle, it could all be random and what not, I accept that, but I hope for more, I yearn for more, and if I am wrong ? I will never know anyway, so I plant my flag in the camp of hope on that end, and may I see those I love once again… somewhere, someway, maybe in a dream that is a parallel reality…
on occasion little things like this pop in my head, today, @ work for example, which is strange, usually work is not the place I am musing, must be a friday thing…. anyway, without further pause…
A prayer to absorb from those who came before might I turn to the wind and hear your voices bathe in your wisdom if only for a moment if only a small slice of the vast share with me your vision so I might not repeat the past
Outstretched cupped hands of woman on white background
why this popped into my head? I have no idea, the whim of the universe I suppose… but go with me and maybe you will reveal something to yourself as I did, so… take your hands, turn them inwards, so your palms and wrists are facing towards your face, connect your pinky tips together and then bring your hands together in the middle seam (top to bottom) like they are sewn together, all the while keeping your palms up in your line of sight… and look, examine, the lines, all those inexplicable lines come together in some sort of crazy jigsaw map of YOU, not a perfect mirror but certainly remnants of that one cell that divided to become two… is the natural state of our hands? a basin, a cup, a vessel, to remind us of the vessel from which we were brought from, I suppose I have noticed this before but for some reason missed the wonder, putting my hands side by side so the lines collide and become one – running outward to the coasts of the palms, a pause of earnest humble, …supplication… when two become one for the greater outcome or goal, this is not prayer with palms together, no, this is asking to receive, a willing flag of good surrender of one’s self to believe, to place faith in a higher fate, and for some reason, this pose, this slight of hands, makes me think of a fetus in the womb, our purest existence untainted and not stained by the outer world as yet, the womb may be the palms themselves cradling life, sheltering in a shell this ultimate gift, the most sacred Matryoska doll inside, do we actually realize we spent nearly a year inside someone else? such a strange and foreign thought that we were very much alive but not breathing as we have done every day since, a semi-aquatic being in world of such all encompassing warmth and yet all darkness but not the darkness of fear, but not absence of light – the light of life inside, an egg in a shell floating within an amazing protective harness, an incubation of our coming self forward, from a couple of cells to this moment, all those years ago and I have no memory – as if, as if I was meant to forget the start of the journey, perhaps like a lotus flower, I was meant to bloom, but archaeological human remnants remain, in this… a basin of hands… so I say thanks in my inner way and stare at my hands once again… with great wonder, I could never have built this alone.
“I pray to the sun – for guidance to the moon – to ease my mind to the stars – as a reminder of infinite possibility to all these – as all humanity once does once has once will may the light become my pathway until my heart beats still”
notes… not a religious thing, more of a spiritual thing, the more years I hang on this familiar mantle I try to just look out and observe all this around me, it is astounding, and yet so nothing compared to the everything, what a dilemma, but it teaches you to love what you have – not what you can never have, does it always hold? hey, I can only try, this is my first time at life (as far as I know), nothing is perfect, nothing is always 100% right, but damn there is beauty in this world I endeavor to enjoy…
a prayer for those in the face of disease
for they are the faces we see
when life is most precarious
or stretched out on a bare thread
we look, to them
an army of the courageous
stewards of duty bound
to put aside the self
for the betterment of we
a prayer for you
for strength
for purpose
for divine providence
in these times of great need.
notes… my thanks to those I know in the field, and those I do not. Sports, a multibillion dollar industry has gone silently and quickly into hibernation, that might be all you need to know about what is important to all nations…
“a whispered prayer to the affirmation of life for spirit to fill me up with the strength to leave the past behind shed molted skin so I may emerge renewed once again through that gate beyond that door so I may be one a child of the sun once more”
notes… I read this to myself like waves licking the coast, sort of that flow, rise and fall, up and down
“my only hope is in the stars to upload my soul upon release so I may travel the walkway to god”
notes… my mind likes puzzles, and is constantly working on such things, I have trouble blocking out the ‘big one’ sometimes, that being our mortality, half way through life (I hope) there is no way to not consider it, that is, for an agnostic like myself, I would love the relief of belief but to date nothing has satisfied me, I used to be smug about it in my younger days, looking down upon those who are religious, I realized later that I do not have the answers so those who find theirs I am grateful for, it just has not happened for me, maybe never will, maybe it doesn’t matter, that is my struggle, really the one we all share regardless of how we got here, into this time, now, the idea of basically never existing, death, is daunting, to say the least.
I wish to sit down with mother earth and exchange pleasant trees so they may grow and I may be remembered within the vessel by the entity that has allowed this life and very breath the will to breathe back life unto her lands
note: I can not say I believe in reincarnation, however my essence, or at least these molecules typing will certainly be part of the earth far longer than my death and birth, I take slight comfort in that, not ultimate comfort but at least I know that my atoms are indeed local, in this neighborhood and were probably embodied in countless bodies of every manner of life… past, present and going forward…
Shades of My Garden 