Porch n’ poem, so I write…

Porch n’ poem, so I write…

beach foam landscape nature
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(sounds to read by)

maybe this is my beach, my refuge, after a long day of grinding, phones ringing beating on my drums, the same old problems at work wrapped up all new and presented, with even a different card and perfume, fading, the low discernible rumble of local traffic humming on the main road beyond sight and a treeline, much like the murmured roar of surf past the markers, strolling barefoot through the soft evening dew of the longer grass, like wading my toes in the small surf of flattened waves receding, splashing with my feet by standing and swinging my legs, as if on a hinge, swinging through the soft wet blades, if kicking up sand, deliberately, the birds, not the same calls, not the same flock, nor the same stock, but birds, none-the-less, sunset etching dunes upon the cloud lines, glowing, reflecting back on the passing day, fireflies like night time embers rising spiral from a log’s crossed flame, the hint of humidity on the tongue, in deep breaths from the nose, moisture hanging in the air, right now, right here, not beholden to any train or bus schedule, or alarm clock, or care, yes, I imagine this is my shore, as it were, a substitute perhaps, perhaps more, perhaps more.

“I council with the earth
read knowledge upon the leaves
reach down and grasp the dirt
to further my beliefs
learn patience from the sky
imagination from the clouds
the flowers teach me of beauty
of which we are all endowed.”

notes… this is a part and parcel (I love that term) of my porch project, get with it, I write these things off the cuff from my porch, maybe I should live stream the creation… one of these days I suppose

music ? linked earlier… 1993, yeah, that year, so this is what I was listening to at the time.. among other things mostly metal, but this was transcendent from a band that was legend… that’s all, enjoy… as usual all thoughts and whatnot are appreciated…

Erosion of the self…

Erosion of the self…

ancient art cosmos dark
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(music to read by)

“every breath erodes
          from within
every exhale
          mere life spent
like sand grinding finely
against the sphinx’s claws
taming out the fierce over time
rounding down the paws,
enticing yet another sleep
under blankets of coming sand
inducing that slumber
until I succumb
waiting, to be discovered again”

notes… wrote this way back in July of last year, revisited tonight, I liked it then, like it more now… maybe I should not be such a stubborn ass and revisit work, but I am who I am, so this one is a rewrite, I like it like I like all my new work, even though this is old work, I am sure the shine will wear off, it always does, something like a curse…

music, the link above is Carbon Based Lifeforms, ambient space type music, I love it, I must confess, so that is all.. have a nice sunday, I think I will be out in the wilderness tomorrow, in the wilds of new jersey, yes they exist, maybe just off a roadway but damn we have some lovely parks, I am sure of it….

always lurking… not a shadow, even though we pretend it so…

always lurking… not a shadow, even though we pretend it so…

flight landscape nature sky
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(music to read this by)

“even without
the palpable perception
the noose is present,
this will be the end
of all of this,
a silence in the wind,
set to hang set to swing
in judgment,
for we are all given
a certain length
and to what lengths
do we go
for more
– rope.”

notes: instead of being morbid, or moribund, let me share a story of life, I was sitting on my porch the other night, whipped out the old acoustic guitar, boy am I out of practice, and lack of callous, but I suppose I have been playing for 20 years now or so… so I can dazzle with some riffs but I know I am not up to par compared to those who bang on the drums all day, anyway, so I was just riffing around on some blues (easy stuff) and some other riffs I know (mostly old metallica), I’m behind my japanese maple, kind of hidden, one of the neighborhood deer sauntered up, slowly, I tried to be still, but would hit a chord now and again as the deer grazed, the deer was not afraid… mostly confused… I would strum a chord or play a note and the the poor deer just looked, tilted it’s head as if to say.. what the hell is that?  I can imagine this suburban deer has heard many things, cars, garbage cans, barking dogs, but the strum on an acoustic guitar from 4 feet away ? doubtful… and clean notes of picking sunday bloody sunday ? nah… after a what seemed like a long time (a few minutes) the deer casually disappeared across the street into my neighbor’s yard which has tons of trees… I don’t know what my expectations are from such encounters… well, actually I do, I hope to convey to the animal that I am no threat, it’s stupid honestly, but honest, a wild animal is not going to understand me… but I put the vibe out there anyway…

music… something a little nerdy musically tonight (a lesson in genre perhaps?), sometimes called “math rock“, that’s not fair, but neither is life, so, basically to me math rock describes music that is not quite “progressive” but yet is definitely not mainstream, virtuoso level playing that is mind bending as a player but if you just listen… there is a space between classical and rock and jazz… I think this is it…

>>> Covet – Sea Dragon

…this poem originally written 4.30, looked over and revised tonight… added punctuation and some words… I always promise to tell you all when I write stuff… why?  honesty, does it matter?  nah…. but yes… to me….

contemplation about creation and fate…

contemplation about creation and fate…

ancient art asia buddha
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“I wear a carved jade stone
I can not feel the hands
of the mark of the creator
just what has been left behind
from that act of creation
this does not mean
this piece
was not meant
for me.

notes… this is personal haiku for me, not the form but the feel and function of what I understand haiku to be, the staccato nature, a question and a truth, is that not haiku? and I literally wear my toki or my manaia daily… I connect to the sea faring way of the maori tradition, not by religion but by spirit if that makes sense… it does to me, at least.

whimsical… and also deeper…

whimsical… and also deeper…

plant branch spice alluaudia procera
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the cross-thatchety bush
a once noble grace
older than the dirt rooted in
twisted by yarns
plated by thorns
no matter the season
the original curmudgeon
like a lair, a cave
darkness spun under the branches
a still shot tornado
in spiral dimensions
a barren pit under
of lost things, souls, dreams
balls of sport most of all
all fallen prey unto this trap
this entrance to the seven levels themselves
a land of deep dark despairs
that no one dares
reach into that space
even the thought of such
will scrape your knuckle bare
– if you are lucky,
even the squirrels shy
the rabbits, do not lurk
they will not thump in that domain
for the lure of safety
is a silent siren’s song
and like on to those rocks
where upon wrecks are wrought
so to is the fate
to those who tempt to tame
that gate that has no lock
and so does remain untouched
the cross-thatchety bush.

notes… the genesis of this might be very local, is there that yard, that place that would swallow toys or balls ?  somewhere you could just not go? physically or just by reputation? I had such places growing up, places where a baseball or an orange hockey ball would go… and it would just be considered “gone”, many years later when those areas were cleared out, by progress, or landscaping, you would find them, all those old frisbees, golf balls, baseballs, deflated basketballs or footballs and all sorts of things… so I was commenting on that, and also some higher level stuff… which you can figure out for yourself, just wanted to explain the genesis of this particular piece, which I wrote on 6.22, and to be honest this is verbatim, just as I wrote it, no edits at all…

music?  let’s do the ambient thing…

>> Carbon Based Life Forms – Derelict

I mused to this today… my mind raced and slowed down, and felt at ease…

what is done on the porch, stays on the porch (OK, not really…)

what is done on the porch, stays on the porch (OK, not really…)

shallow focus photography of yellow star lanterns
Photo by 嘉淇 徐 on Pexels.com

“dearest firefly,
so you have returned
I might call you a beacon
but know not who you signal
a lighthouse perhaps?
but we are miles from any shores
perhaps you are a flare
but I see no alarm
in any part of the land,
are you just a flash in the pantheon
of your winged kind
an oddity among your brethren
as you sway and dip and climb,
where have you been all this time?
only to return
in your love of the sweat humid nights
of summer,
I suppose you are a wiser being than I
for your pick of season
seems that of an inspired mind,
I do not know your purpose
or even your fate
my little floating lantern
you seem to exist for only beholder’s sake,
good night, my sweet darling of light.
sincerely,
also musing”

written on the porch tonight, side story, my town is mostly being re-populated by asians, chinese and indian, I don’t care, I actually find it interesting, so anyway, most are cold and walk by as if I am not there, journal in hand, barefoot walking on my lawn, but there is this one chinese family, the little girl (5-6 years old?) is in the “hello” phase, she says hello to pretty much everything, my car, the mailbox, me (multiple times), it infects her father to do the same, at least with humans like me, I can’t tell you how enlightening it is, how a child just breaks down all walls with a simple hello protocol, it makes me smile, regardless of how the day would like to grind me into a nub… is it weird to sit out in front of your house and observe ? I don’t know, I don’t care, it is what I do, especially lately, we are all passengers on this plane headed for the same destination anyway…

music : Minus the Bear – Electronic Rainbow (b-side) I love the pace and immediacy…

abstraction, or the abstracted

abstraction, or the abstracted

brown and white snake
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“inside the serpent’s mouth
lies the serpent’s tongue
a servant’s master
the sum of none
the more you bleed
the more you believe
so come grasp this dirt
to know the cold dead feel
a mantle of skin
on an oceanic ball of magma
induction into loop
into destruction
for the renewal
of the temporal
rise.
non est chao
per universum iussit”

notes… one of those that just came to me in some weird way, the muse, inspiration, whatever you may call it… I am hinting at plate tectonics here as well… I am a bit of a science wonk after all… and the latin ?  nah, if you want to know search it out…

lost. love. letters.

lost. love. letters.

silhouette photo of man and woman about to kiss
Photo by Varun Chandak on Pexels.com

6.12.19
if –
the after life
is –
and I might die today
I would wish to see you tomorrow
with you
only you
my lost
my love


6.8.19self inflicted
I have been led to believe
that time heals all wounds
so how does that explain, you
from fortune cookies
to books wiser than me
from veteran mouths with far more experience
and yet-

wounds leave scars
as tales of reminder
sign post detours
but this, this is alteration
my self inflicted sentence
even the blame feels empty
against the missing
to never be honored by your love again
penance is no medicine
age is no doctor
for you are in my heart
for all ever after.

notes… I am kicking around the idea of making lost.love.letters a regular thing, I write a lot about her because I think about her a lot, it is something that I can not shake, at least for now, so… maybe I will do it as a thursday thing, thunder day, because that is what is in my heart. (of course technically I am posting on friday… but cmon…)

music? Minus the Bear – Last Kiss (live, acoustic), listen to the damn words people

all thoughts, comments, mango blackened chicken recipes are appreciated (I can tell you a story about that mango chicken thing…)

chalk outline.

chalk outline.

pink leafed trees on green grass field
Photo by Jan Krnc on Pexels.com

a grand scene
within the confines of hours
cherry blossoms to the slaughter
dashed petals in a downpour
littered about the earthen floor,
a grand scene
laid out with random care
cast out runes
read upon them
the fate of these
fallen blooms

notes: cherry blossoms are a big thing here in NJ and also DC, but they are very temporary, that is what I was writing about, it was like walking up on a murder scene, all of a sudden, in one afternoon from full bloom to all the petals trounced on the ground, it made me think of some CSI scene, yellow tape and all (poem written originally 5.21, slightly adjusted tonight).

music ?  (a bit of a guilty pleasure pick)

>>>Gin Blossoms – Found Out About You