Month: October 2020

breaking up is hard to do (from Sirius XM)

breaking up is hard to do (from Sirius XM)

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Photo by Moose Photos on Pexels.com

let this be a cautionary tale, since I get company vehicles I received satellite radio with each new one, I was out on the road more often in the past so I signed up for XM service fulltime on my dime, however, in these pandemic daze… or days, I am not nearly out on the road so much (plus I have tons of stuff to listen to on my USB drive anywho), I got a new car (and my ex-car was passed to a new tech) so I figured I would just let my XM subscription run out by itself and not even worry about it (giving the new guy free radio for a bit), easy peasy, right? nah… not so much… I get this screaming yellow letter that my account is past due and they will continue to charge me (the credit card on file is expired), so I figure I could cancel this online… right? nope… back to screaming yellow letter, the phone number in big print should work…nope… well then, at the very very very bottom, and in ant size oompa loompa font print there is a completely different phone number for cancel requests, Stall Tactic #1 (here on out known as “ST#”), so I call the (small) number, I have to verify my entire DNA genome, twice, (I mean just an account number is not sufficient in this day and age? please…), that would be ST#2 for those keeping score @ home, call center connects, I have to verify all my info, again, twice (seriously, ST#3), guess what? their computer system is having ‘trouble’ (ST#4+), I get put on hold a few times for this, semi-robotic-non-sincere apologies are not exactly soothing my soul, not to mention that the words “I want to cancel” do not seem to penetrate into the lobe of the phone conductor, so after this myriad of delays (15 minutes in now) the clerk informs me I need to ‘take care of my balance’ for the amount my radio was being ‘used’ past the expiration date, $24.14… OK, no big deal, I’m ready to deal, seems simple? nope… I am informed that I need to pay a total of $241.64 to bring my account current (that is the yearly rate), what? but then I would be issued a credit … wait for it… “if I want to cancel”… (insert hair pulling here), so almost 30 min in @ this point and I have to pay ahead to go ahead and cancel my account, maddening, I protest, a couple more times put on hold (ST#5), finally the clerk reads me some legal mumbo jumbo and is going to take my $24.14 to bring my account current, whew, near done? right… ? nah… so I give her my credit card number, twice (of course), put on hold… she comes back, ‘I’m sorry that card is declined’ (ST#6+), this is a brandy new card, I have near perfect credit, and there is not even a balance on it… so, we go through the card number again, twice (as if you had to ask?), put on hold… and low and behold, viola! my card works, how magical… she says ‘OK, your account is current after the $241.64 charge’, what?!? now I think I understand that astronaut who put on diapers and drove across the country… so I again, reiterated irately that I wanted to “cannnnncelllll theeeeee aaaaaahhhcountttttt”, (cruising past the 40 minute mark now), ‘I understand but before I can transfer you to that department -were you able to have everything you needed done on our call today?-‘ (phone drop sound, on my end) “No, of course not, how can you even ask that question?!” ‘ok, sir, sorry for the inconvenience, please hold’… (ST#, ahh… who’s counting), another person picks up, I think you can guess what happens here, I have to give them my information… from scratch… again… I was pretty much at my end here so… the conversation went south (I am omitting a bunch of ‘put on holds’ for the sake of my sanity)…
“I want to cancel my service”
‘do you no longer have the 2017 Hyundai?’
“No, it was crashed and took both my legs with it”
(and without a hitch…)
‘so will you be getting a new vehicle?’
“No, my wheel chair does not have a radio”
‘well, I was looking through your account and it seems we can offer you 41% off for the year, that would be a credit of $120 off what you have already paid for the year’
“NO… I WANT TO CANCEL MY ACCOUNT”
(nearly an hour in… last nerve twitched and frazzled, but I did not use obscenities’.. I was close though… so damn close…)
and finally… finally… I get a confirmation of the cancellation… now I know what it feels like to run a marathon and break through that little tape thing @ the end and collapse in a joyous puddle of my own fluids… ok, maybe that’s a touch gross… but I digress…

I don’t support boycotts and the like… but companies should be called out for garbage like this…

autumn drive by 7/5/7

autumn drive by 7/5/7

by David Koblentz ♥ 1 Comment

wildflowers stand in the rain
colors are striking
autumn, before leaves are none

notes: alternate haiku form here… came to me driving around today, yes, there are literal wildflower fields on the sides of the highways here these days (see : this), I saw a patch, and these words popped into my head as is (a splash of color on a dreary wind driven rain day), I have often just wanted to pull over, pull a selfie diving into such fields… but they never come out as you think they should, the hills are not alive with the sound of music, just people laughing at my epic fails falling into such scenery… so maybe I revealed too much…

thoughts from the porch (still on the beach) ‘world’s apart’…

thoughts from the porch (still on the beach) ‘world’s apart’…

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

what a strange turn of events this vacation has been, I come here to escape the masses and now they are here en masse, at least compared to this time of year most years, so where can I escape to? the only refuge left, as the bars and restaurants rev up, as the cars line up, the beach becomes a haven, most folks I suppose look for the sun and sand, I am more for the sound of the shore, the hotel pool bar is in full swing as I walk by, some country song is blaring, I couldn’t tell you which one, not my scene, I get to the boards that lead off to the beach, take off my shoes where the boards disappear into the dunes, no need to get them full of sand, the sand is cold, expected, I walk away from the direction of the town, as the sounds fade into the forward sound of the ocean crashing, I find the line just beyond where civilization has no longer hold on the audio, the beach is still lit from backdrop behind me, but here I am, just deep enough on the beach to blank out the world, only a matter of feet, but that is all that matters, I here some voices here and there in the dark, but no one approaches, or if they do they are mere shadows, what I mistake for a person turns out to be the warning sign for the jetty, all the artificial light behind me, all the smiles, the laughs, the music, all the normal draw, but here I am more enamored with the stars, and even the stardust in between, there seems to be motion, for surely there is, but the earth is also moving, spinning, so which of these is? both I suppose, but only my perception sitting here on the cold sand, I bury my bare feet in, I feel like I am evaporating into the sky, actually perceiving the world draining me into that expanse, something I have felt before, like those first nights of cold as you watch your breath take form, except this is like smoke, mist or steam, streaming off of my soul, but no panic, only calm, to become part of the cosmos, the possibilities, for as ancient as the ocean is, there is only so much to this marble, as amazing as she is, I wish to travel to the stars, in whatever form, past this limited life, there must be more, or I hope there is more, the answers, or even uncontemplated questions out there, up there, I feel the pull…
running my hands through the sand, reminds me of sandcastles, how we would build them on the water’s edge, always thinking we could out smart or out maneuver the ocean, never thinking for a minute we would lose, youthful optimism (some may say naivete, I say no), maybe that is just who I am, or always was, even now, that I know the inevitabilities, I still fight for the sandcastles, dredge trenches to oppose the incoming tide, for what else is there?
the beach looks lunar at night, frozen footprints from those who have been, the same stars, no sounds from animals, the birds have gone to sleep, craters and valleys all around, the same color, the same bland color all around, the only savior, here at least, the sound, the constant purr of the evening ocean sliding beneath the dunes, the tune that surely is the oldest known, to all land.

triggers: the raw bar

triggers: the raw bar

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

there are different memories of mine of the jersey shore, the real one, not what you saw on TV, wildwood crest when I was a child (boardwalk with rides and games) and then later on Cape May, I never recoiled, as early as I can recall, at the raw seafood bar (specifically talking about The Lobster House), it took me a while to get used to oysters however, but clams? I suppose we were meant to be, I suppose texturally they are similar to oysters but not for me, I like the chewability of them, yes, I like to chew them, big ole cherrystones on the half shell raw, I notice many people kind of slurp them down quickly, only getting a bit of the ocean flavor doused in cocktail sauce, kind of powering through them like shots of liquor, I want more than that flash, I want to know where they are from to savor the flavor, for a moment more at least, this particular raw bar, was my first, and to which all others have always been compared, maybe the location has something to do with it, my home state, the vacation memories with my folks and now my own-some, all these years, the same, you order them up, they schuck them up, nothing fancy, a big plate of ice, a wedge of lemon, a container of cocktail sauce, no crackers (sorry Maryland), a dollar store child’s size plastic fork, and that all adds up to perfection, with social distancing in order, I had to take my order down the dock, literally the raw bar’s backdrop is the dock where the commercial fishing boats come in to deliver their catch, you sit in their shadows and can almost listen to their histories creaking in the hulls, certainly smell the fresh ocean and a bit of oil, seating is equally simple, tables made out of those rope storage spools painted over too many times to count, surrounded by the ubiquitous plastic white chairs, even in covid times there is comfort there in this setting, while not bustling it was busier than I might have thought, the every other minute decades old sounding announcement system bleating out about orders ready at the takeout window, “ticket 1916, ticket 1916, ready @ the takeout window”, but I concentrate on my plate, a glistening fresh 2 dozen, I could eat 100, or more, probably, I try to remind myself to slow down, take a sip of amstel in-between, but damn they are so good, all those memories triggered in a bite flood my entirety, the burst of sea water, a tinge of cocktail sauce, the meaty texture of the clam bellies, everything I remember, surely would be a disappointment if it were not, but my entire life, this one spot, nothing seems to change even in a pandemic year, and in a way, it calms my soul, letting me know everything will be just fine, at least for now, with a simple plate of clams, well, now… they are … gone.
(side note “the raw bar” would make a great strip club name, just saying)

thoughts from the porch (beach edition)…

thoughts from the porch (beach edition)…

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

6:50pm
the sand is cold, I could wear shoes, I know, but that is not the essence of the beach for me, the volleyball courts are empty, for some reason I think it bad karma to cross them, the lines defined that is, silly I guess, but we all have our idiosyncrasies, a stiff steady wind pushes in from the ocean, my journal’s bookmark flapping wildly about like some worn flag that has seen one thousand seasons and as many storms, so I walk toward the remains of the sunset, somewhere in the back of my mind this seems a warmer path, maybe it is just the exercise of walking in sand, feet sinking in, there are a few other travelers here, as I suppose there would be, or at least should be, there is the inner conflict of wanting to share such a place and yet commit it all for your own, both thoughts feel at home in my mind but I suppose I do not own this open secret, so here you are, welcome, the rush of the waves provides constant sound, I hear nothing of humanity at the moment, not a drop of the usual din seems to reach my ears, except the wind, not howling, not screaming, nor a gentle hand, somewhere in the limbo that lies between all those, a rising firm calm if you will, gulls glide silently above, a couple walks by with their young child, also silent, I can not accurately describe the golden shimmer of the leftover tide in the sand and fading sunlight, wave upon rolling wave, maybe this is the only timeless thing I may ever encounter or perceive, back there, just some hundred or so feet, the supposed real world, none of that has ever felt like this inside my bones, is this abject loneliness? I have always been an optimist, no, I am not lonely even if I am quite alone, I just feel something missing, perhaps…
I can feel the darkness of the rest of the beach creeping up my back behind me, I do not dare to look and become a pillar of sea salt, no, I look forward to the only hope I have, the only light left, even with a useless breath, might I, fight the inevitable –
with this, a moment, an experience, a performance on the oldest stage, might even Homer blush, for he knew, as do I, our temporal nature, among nature, while born of gods this realization, or born of science, much the same, these waves have seen many eyes before mine, and many more still when I am gone, for at least I was this once, graced with the best seats in the house.

staccato style.

staccato style.

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment
Photo by Moussa Idrissi on Pexels.com

a glass of bourbon
on the hotel balcony
by the beach
a poor substitute
for a family
night prescribed
perhaps I have not tried hard enough
the way the dice fall
always a pair
and this is autumn
how many springs and summers
will I
for surely less than more
night has calling
sunset missed, I blinked
midnight scrapped, strapped, a bedouin
lies in my bed, perhaps.

notes: I am in Cape May NJ this week, one of my escape hatches, but that does not always let me free of my thoughts, as they are, and so here they are…

random prayer…

random prayer…

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

on occasion little things like this pop in my head, today, @ work for example, which is strange, usually work is not the place I am musing, must be a friday thing…. anyway, without further pause…

Photo by enfantnocta on Pexels.com

A prayer to absorb
from those who came before
might I turn to the wind
and hear your voices
bathe in your wisdom
if only for a moment
if only a small slice of the vast
share with me your vision
so I might not repeat the past

and will I… ?

and will I… ?

by David Koblentz ♥ 0 Leave a Comment

Photo by Lina Kivaka on Pexels.com

(1)
climb
will I see paris before I die?
to savor love upon the bridge of locks
hide’n dance n’the shadows of triumph
rise in the tower on champs de mars
n’dip my bones in the river siene

to see the frozen steps of everest
be fed from the kindred spirit hands of tibet
brail-read the walls of the khyber pass
and flow into the ganges herself as everlast

to witness pink waves of flamingos
island hops the flock n’galapagos
count time with a tortoise there
with an iguana squad scout the surf
shooting salt skyward with a puff

from the seven hills of italy
romulus and remus might guide my way
past the seven twined of istanbul
pass the gate to the holy lands
on to salted pillars of the deadly sea

may I lay down along
the nazca lines
and so align
along orion’s belt
all,
before I die,
will I see paris, one more time?

(2)
stuck on an island divorced from pangea long ago
“will I see paris before I die?”
I asked the also flightless kakapo
“surely you did not expect me to answer, for that would be absurd”
I thought the bird might mutter
but what is more absurd than a flightless bird?
“have you bothered to look in the mirror?, SIR” rocco concurred
fair point, for a stranger in a strange land
a spectrum island if there has ever been
even in this waking dream
I keep thinking I might run into a hobbit or two
surely up for a brew or some song and more ale or two
but the maori tell me of more
a place to jump into the hereafter
if only I could muster the muster
to disappear into the tasman sea

notes… again, I stipulate, that sometimes things just come to me, or occur to me @ random, this is one of those works, just random universe influenced onto my thoughts, I can not explain it fully nor do I care to, at this point in my life I prefer to let it flow, so here it goes…