a moment of reflection, a pause from the virusphere…

a moment of reflection, a pause from the virusphere…

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sometimes life, nature, god, luck, circumstance, whatever you might like to call such things, just sneak up on you, with a wink, a nod, the miracle of whimsy, the unexpected, you just have to be open for the gentle (subtle, perhaps at times imperceptible) tap on the shoulder, take that spare second to pull over in life and look, or just pay some attention to the world unfurling swirling around you, tonight was one of those moments, I could say magical, if I believed in magic, I might just say natural, because that much I can touch and measure with my given senses, there is a strange thing about living in this new bubble, maybe more of a slow cauldron, the din of the news, the bombardment, the virus invading every inch of life closing in, seemingly, the break of routine, the uncertainty, the caution of not knowing what is coming next, for worse or for better, even a rational folk such as myself feels the pressure out there, being nestled next many of the epicenters whether it is one town over, actual deaths reported in the town I work, nearly all of Bergen county shut down, it bears weight upon you, every cough you hear has more gravity, every sneeze you witness raises your awareness and perception, head on a swivel, is it warm in here or do I have a fever? perhaps I just need a valium for relief, but alas, nature provides sometimes in these times, I paused at a Parkway rest area on the way home, to take some time to clean out the car (I travel a lot), starbucks cups, other relics of the comfort life taken for granted on the passenger side floor, I took a pause to stand, kind of arms slung over the driver’s side door, a deep breath, drawn out almost like a yawn, in an effort to let the day bleed out of me back into the ground, release valve the pent up anxiety, almost sunset, a slight cold onset in the longing shadows, and then, this curious little fellow just brazenly dropped into the middle of my frame of reference, a robin, well known in these parts of course, nothing to write a blog post about I thought, but as in many things my initial thoughts betrayed underlying truth, this little thing was pure bravado, heck the robins in my yard at home run off from nearly the threat of my shadow, not this one, this is a ‘jersey rest area robin’, a different breed, you know, jersey strong, or so the fantasy proceeds, but he (or she, we’ll just assume ‘he’ for the rest of this tale, for convenience) looked up at me with seemingly no fear, bouncing ever closer, I tried not to move, to be a statue as I thought this little guy was mistaken or had no clue I was there, ever closer he bounced, was it something I threw out that caught his interest? I thought I might let it play out, five feet to four, to three to two, I was sure flight was a mere flinch away, but I moved anyway, nothing sudden, and he could not have cared one spit less, jersey strong indeed, so close now I thought he might hop in my shoulder for a spell, that would be cool, so close I could see almost upside down eyelashes and all the minute details of his face, I can’t recall ever being this close, the brilliant red radiance of his breast, quite puffed out for show, lavish and bright against the worn green of winter grass and empty trees, and then he just bounded by, right in front of me, one foot out two, three to four away now, to pick on some tasty morsel or so I guess, paying me no mind, and I realized, my piled up alarm day anxiety had been swept away, all gone, from spending a moment with a rest stop robin, with a nod and thanks, I left.

notes…. in all this craziness it is not a bad thing to spot a beam of radiance… I can not explain the mysterious power of the Parkway and my writing but often they are inextricably linked…

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