Second thoughts… and blog regrets…

Second thoughts… and blog regrets…

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Champagne wishes and caviar dreams… so I was thinking… as I usually do, I have had moments where I question what I post (after the fact)… but it is so damn silly (in the scheme of things), so what if I lose a few of you? honestly…  I say I am doing this for me (and I am, it is sort of therapy)… but obviously everyone loves the (any) attention or adoration, the seduction… I would love to tell you I am soooo above it, I would love to tell you I soooo haven’t pondered it… but that is complete crap.  I am trying to not care (not saying not having appreciation, that is a different thing my friends)… but I am human, it is nice to be recognized, I certainly am not above it… but I want to be at some level of it, I want to actually have accolades with you face to face (or at least digitally)… why?  because the rest is bullshit, plainly said.  I will disappoint you, hell, I disappoint myself, I hold the bar way too damn far above my bloated dumb head… but I am trying, so thank you for writing, reading or … anything, I’m flawed, but I have a penchant for the pen chants… so I will write and continue to throw things to the wind (you all), please let some of it pass as angry rain, it will not all be a windfall of wisdom, do I want it to be?  of course… damn high standards, damn walls, I am trying.  I want to post and not think about consequence… and those who like it ? great? those who don’t – the world is a big place… surely I know less people and touch less people than there is in the world, or ever was, or ever will be, I am trying humility, even if it doesn’t seem to come in my size (I will talk to the retailer when I get the chance).  simply – thanks.

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