demeanor
how it all can turn on a dime, either way I suppose, for once I actually dragged one my laptops out here, usually I am scribbling in one of my journals like a manic chipmunk on speed, which is nice but if you have seen my handwriting transcribing those notes is not what most would term a good time, immediately I am distracted by my background in my foreground, maybe bringing a modern device into this is a distraction I did not count on, I suppose I might, but for some reason I feel the urgent thundering impulse to empty my recycle bin, why? no logic, call it a clean slate for my mind…
so yes, my little corner of the world is not so impressive (pictured above), it’s not awful by any means, there is plenty of nature to comfort, more than you might think for an outlier of new york city, a well developed and trafficked area, consumed by human activity except for the ‘green areas’ so designated as parks and the like, but you have to take what you can to unwind from the pace, literally think about giving your mind some space, get lost in the little jigs various birds make as they go about their goings, wafts of barbecue fill the near night air, now I know that must seem as blasphemy to some, I am quite aware, here, in these northern exposures, the q is more a general catch all term for grilling, not the art form ritual performed in other states, however, the smell is the smell is the smell, and it is one of those things that rings of spring, and even more so summers, all I need to hear is the ice cream truck and I am delivered, but that is a ways off, and far between anyway these days, those trucks were almost mythical, peter piper had nothing on a truck that could draw forth hordes of children like sirens to the rocks, gladly flailing ourselves down the street in pursuit, the mad hatter dash, push pops, bomb pops, or a nutty buddy, like frozen christmas stocking stuffers delivered in the middle of the staunchest heat, on the hottest days of course you had to employ strategy, from what your ordered to how you attacked said treat with you mouth, always on the borderline of brain freeze, and often over, but better that fate than dripping down your arms…
there is the value in just sitting still for a moment, letting thoughts just flow through, I was transported there, I could practically feel myself in pursuit of the ice cream truck and that magical jingle, and suddenly the day has washed off my back, until that bracing alarm in really mere hours for now, the unfulfilling temptation of the snooze bar, like a morning moment opiate, and the whole cycle starts again, but here in my little corner, I can listen, neighbors making small talk about lawns and the coming invasion, the ever distant tatters of light shading different hues to the cloud bellies, the bird chatter seems to be spiraling down by the minute, almost a contest to see who gets in the last word chirp as a matter of pride, I wonder if they know I am listening.